so.....

     might i have the tools i need to do something meaningful? i have a blog, i have a domain website, and i have a vision. it cannot be said enough, the vision i have has been hard to blossom, but that is only by the lackluster power of the wielder. if i want to make something of all of this, i NEED to make something out of it.
     obviously i need support, but how do i get that? i only have so many friends, i need thousands....millions.....of eyes on my work once i get going. i do not even know why i am typing all of this out right now. i guess it might be cause i have not updated this in a very long time.
     soilchild.com might be retooled for something else. something more like the purpose of this blog. i will use the tools in the paid site for greater purpose.
     i guess thats all for now.

BEHOLD...the opportunist

     Amid the chaos, a man took the opportunity to take back his losing bet, almost a complete success. If for not the honesty of the individual who's action helped kickstart the chaos, that man would have stayed in the casino and probably continued to test his abilities on the table. 

     This is how the situation progressed. Player on seat one is banking, he has put out 400$ in chips to play using the dealer hand on blackjack. He can only win or lose 400$ the first bank he does. Other than him, there are five other players playing at the table, all of which bust and lose except 1, who has a 50$ bet and a blackjack. The bonus payout is 10$, making it a 60$ winner. 

     Very important to the player banking is the down card of the dealer hand. The numerical value of that card becomes the action point. This is where payouts/collections begin. Action card is a 5, so the action hand is seat 5, which is where the blackjack hand is. The player banker has only big chips (100$) in the bank, so the dealer would have to break down a chip to make the payout. Instead of letting the dealer break down the chip into 25's and 5's, he takes 60 out of his own stack, which would not be a big deal to me if the banker covers the action on the table, in this case, if there was 400$ or less in player bets.

     At this point I do a snapshot of total action and count over 400 on the table, so I immediately stop the dealer from continuing. "What is the problem," is basically the response I get from the dealer, player/banker and another player on the last seat. I explain that it is fine that he pays 60$ from his own stack of chips, but because there is only 400 in the bank, he can only win 340$, basic subtraction. Somehow this deduction I have made does not make sense to the dealer and the other 2 mentioned above, so after some dialogue between me and them we decide to go back, skip the shortcut, and go step by step. Problem solved....

     ......Only now his 400$ covers the table!!! Sadly I did not stop the game at this point to determine if I counted wrong earlier, I just let the dealer continue with the payout/collection process. I felt inside that there is something wrong with this picture, but brushed it aside assuming I just counted wrong. We continue the hand and when finished I get up from the table. 

     While on the adjacent table, my coworker asks me how much the player on seat 5 had bet, and I said 200$. It appears there is something wrong on the table. The player banker now realizes that I was onto something and notices that the losing bet amount was not accurate. 

     After a camera check, we find out that seat 5 had pulled his money back while I was being triple teamed. He saw an opportunity, me being distracted, to get his money back. This revelation pissed me off because...how many times before this with other players did this happen? I always thought of myself as an exceptional banker with great observational skills, but here I was proven otherwise. 

     Thank you opportunist, because I have been shown a fault in me, overconfidence, and now I am prepared. There is so much for me to improve on, I just needed to be beaten to see his.

     

dub step and lights

I went to a little dive bar by the name of Johnny V's Monday night with a good friend of mine. It has been a while since i have been out somewhere with live music, even a dj. The atmosphere was nice and friendly, but the music took some getting used to.
I dis not go out to get drunk, i only had one and a half beer (a shared 22oz heineken in the parking lot) so my nerves were not as loose as they could have been. Since i was only familiar with the dub step genre from the few times i checked it out on pandora, i could not familiarize myself enough to get down to the beats.
Eventually i had enough of standing and bobbing my heqd. I walked to my car, deposited this here ipod touch, my glasses with the case, and my wallet, and walked back into the bar. Finally, i was ready to look like a lost soul dancing with the others. It was obvious that there was no style, precedent, nor judgment being tossed around out there. People moved qs they felt they should move like, and that is some easy business. I was also now comfortable enough to meet and greet people. Everybody except my friend was a stranger, and i thought this might be a good time to practice calming my nerves when i qpproach people to chit chat.
After all was said and dine, i met 6 new people, got their names, already forgot their names, and learned a little about them.
One guy was selling drugs, another man was looking dor drugs. One girl liked metal music and had swedish blood like myself, another girl was friends with ghe first. One guy i think works at starbucks, while another guy supposedly skipped out on rhiannas halloween party because he promised to spend halloween with his daughter. This guy should have went to the party because he said some crazy things that brought a restraining order on himself so now he has to stay away from his home and his daughter.
Even though i am not one to make dubstep gatherings a regular entry to my agenda, i am glad i went. It was fun dancing like a brain synapse with others around me doing the same, it was fun hanging out with my friend, and it was fun connecting with 6 strangers. Where to next?

Fishing

Everyone has probably heard the fishing phrase, "hook, line, and a sinker." Now I may not be a fisherman, but I think I know what these terms mean. The hook is what the bait is attached to. The line is what holds onto the hook while the sinker directs the gettup down. Fishing is for caveman.
Life needs drive, a direction guided by a purpose. We need to have some kind of rudimentary idea of our own endgame with some sort of blueprint telling us how to get there. Whether it is a career choice, the possession of a family, or a destination, we can do so much more with ourselves if we set goals. Humans are an evolving creature. Our brains contain tremendous potential, and the craziest thing is we do not even use all of it! Can you imagine the day in the future when we are actually using 50 percent of the brain? I sure cannot. Goals can be one avenue for humans to utilize more of their brain, a vector in which the brain can attach it's tendrils on and synapse it's way to, well whatever it may be.
I look at that simple fishing term as a guide to living life well. Aren't we all fishing for something? Don't we want something new and exciting to churn up that lost joy buried under the sediment that is our daily routine? There is so much this world has to offer, and so much us humans can do with the brief time period we call our lifespan. Grab a hook, stab it through a goal, and toss it out into the world. Be the fish. Swim through normality searching for your own bait, endlessly peeling back the curtain of mediocrity so easily found in the world until you find that bait and take a nibble at your goal. Be patient, you must wait till the floater does a dip into the water before reeling in the catch. It may be a big fish you set yourself up with, or it may be just a bite sized snack, either way the satisfaction of the catch is priceless and the excitement for more has only just began.
Soon enough you will desire, not only to fill the bucket up with fish, but to fill the whole boat! Life will feel fuller, directed, and maybe even simplified. Math utilizes formulas to solve problems that would otherwise be too difficult for most ordinary Joe's. Well, fishing just became your very own formula. It has a set procedure that has been passed down for thousands of years, the only thing we have to do now is choose our bait in hopes that we can be patient enough to wait for that special fish to take a nibble.

another

     Maybe it is because I have not posted, or maybe it is because people just don't care anymore, but I have had no visitors to this blog recently. It's, ok, I am not hurt. I guess I really need to get this thing interesting. I will create another blog entry, not related to this one, to keep up to date with things not related to this outreach blog.

questions? exclamations!

     Recent events, observances, and conversations make it most important to do something now. Now is the time to move, not later. If I am to be something, somebody, there is no need to postpone my success. Procrastination has always been a vice of mine, but no longer will I set my self so low. What I have in store for my family, and everybody close to me, should not be delayed any longer.
     One of my good friends discussed something with me a couple of weeks ago. We, as humans, are composed of energy, and energy cannot be destroyed. Though we cannot put any finger on our so called 'mind', we can not deny that we have a mind, hosting our consciousness, which we use at every moment we are alive. From what I have learned, anything that is functional takes energy to...well function. 
     Anyway, the point he was expressing is we should create our own positive energy in this life we are in, because this energy will be transferred on to our next existence. Avoiding negative and hurtful actions is a great place to start. Not only do I hurt others, but I hurt myself by acting this way. Too often I upset others, and always it is reciprocrated. Mostly it is family issues, but not always. Thinking back just early this morning at work, I got into it with a customer who is always such a jerk. I did not need to say anything to him, but I did, and it turned ugly real fast. I was worried a little bit, but nothing more happened, just an exchange of words. For the second time since I have worked there, I was told by an asshole that I am nothing and that is why I work for the corporation. Hurtful words indeed, but coming from an asshole, it loses its potency. Regardless, though I may be less than you financially, but existence is so much more lively than theirs. Attitude is important, and to go around always negative is such a freaking downer that I know he is weighed down every day with this.
     Now I am considering taking our encounter a step further, and killing him. Hehe, just kidding. Consider this, what if I apologize and get his story? He might have had a very good life, and something just went haywire and now he is this madman. Perseverance and patience will have to be key, because I know a man like him will be a tough egg to crack. 
     I met another man this week, one who was not a meany, and who gave me some great advice. He told me I do not speak with confidence, how I end my sentences with a question mark rather than an exclamation point. He told me he did not believe a shit of what I was saying because of this. I do know I have some conversational flaws which I need to work on, I just do not know what they are. At least this gentleman helped me discover one of them. 
     On a totally different note, I saw a couple of things that I did not expect to see. One of them, I did not expect to see ever, but the other one was just a matter of time until my eyes feasted on its be holdings. Both of these, though, help me want to live in the now, to protect myself from dangers, and keep my family safe and close at all times. Life can change in the blink of an eye, so take every step with caution, and keep your direction pointing to positive, leaving negativity behind. 
     

delayed

     I have not forgotten about this blog, nor the importance of it to every reader out there. As of right now, I have been preoccupied with other things that have been needing my attention. Working six days a week really puts me behind on many of my duties at home, so catch up time is necessary. But please, don't lose hope in me, or this blog, content will be coming in droves, and you all will be moved.